Tunneling Out With a Spoon

As of today, I have 13 more days left here in Chicago. Some big changes have taken place, and I'm very excited about them! Everything has been chaotic, and I've waited for things to settle into place before writing about them. Now that they have, I'm so excited to share my news! There's a lot, so buckle up...

• This coming Friday my BFF is coming to visit. Aside from a brief 1-hour visit over Thanksgiving, I haven't seen her since I left Oklahoma, and we haven't had one-on-one BFF time together in years. I'm super jazzed. I expect many nights of wine, old movies ("She's the Man", anyone?) and lots of talking and laughing are in our future.

• I recently received formal approval of my Master's thesis for the Sociology department, and once I complete my last two classes (next week) I will officially earn my Master's degree in Sociology! Graduation is May 9, and my family and Eric are all flying up to celebrate with me. We already have some fun things planned. After the ceremony everyone is going to come back to my apartment (350 square feet of celebration!) for some snacks and drinks. Then we'll head out to dinner later that night. My family will be here for a few days, and since this is one of the very few times they'll ever have a reason to be in Chicago, we're going to make the most of it by visiting some museums and doing a boat tour of the city. After being so far away for 2 years, only seeing my family 5 or 6 times in a 12-month period, I'm very excited that we'll get to spend some time together. 

• I also recently accepted a formal job offer from Miss Helen's Private School in Tulsa. I'm going to be teaching preschool full-time, starting in June. Thanks to a dear friend who told me about the opening, I was able to wrangle myself an interview and use my charming face and sparkling personality to get my foot in the door for my ultimate career goal of being a teacher. For a little over a year now, I've realized that what I really want to spend my life doing is educating others, and even more, I want to inspire others to love learning the way that I do. Learning can open so many doors. It's not just about a good job and a good salary later on in life, but education can also be the stepping stone to pursuing your dreams. (An excellent example is the love of my life, Eric, who was able to pursue his dream of flying airplanes through OU's aviation program.) I can't wait to start working and spending my time doing what I love, near the people I love. Being in Tulsa means being close to friends and family, surrounded by wide open spaces! I can't begin to tell you how much I have missed having big fields, tall trees, and wide open blue skies (and the occasional thunderstorm)-- it's going to be so good for my soul to be back in that environment. 

These past 2 years in Chicago have been wonderful in their own way. I received a terrific education in the graduate program, and having the opportunity to get this degree while also not having to pay for it has been a gift for which I will be grateful forever. I learned that I am capable of taking care of myself, no matter what-- I moved across the country and built a life all by myself. There's something extremely satisfying and reassuring in knowing that I am capable of independence, although it's going to be nice to move back to where I have a support system so I won't have to do it all by myself. And I got the opportunity to see what this kind of life would be like. When I graduated college I didn't really know where I wanted to go or what I wanted to do. Now that I've had a chance to see what's out there, I feel like I can embrace these life changes completely, without fearing that I'm missing out on something else.

I have found my way to a new job in a familiar place, and I'm so thrilled to be able to start this new phase of my life. There are few things quite so satisfying as the moment where everything finally comes together. Let me tell you, I'm drinking that moment in.

Fancy Fish Cakes

Eric and I have been trying to find ways to include more seafood in our diets. One of the easiest ways we've been able to do this is by purchasing bags of frozen fish filets and eating at least one meal each week from that. However, eating the same type of fish over and over again can get a little repetitive, especially if it's fixed the same way each time.

So this week I tried out a new recipe I saw in my Real Simple cook book: Dijon Fish Cakes (like crab cakes, but cheaper!) Oh my gosh. It was a DELICIOUS meal, and so affordable! And it was so incredibly easy. You can use pretty much any type of fish you like. We used Swai because that's what we had on hand, but we're planning to try this recipe with Flounder, Salmon, and Tilapia. Each fish will lend its own unique flavor!

We ate our cakes with a side of broccoli and potatoes. There were a couple cakes leftover, and I used those to make little sandwiches on whole wheat buns for lunch the next day.

For this recipe you'll need:
4 8-oz fish filets
2 eggs
1/4 to 1/2 cup mayo
1 heaping Tablespoon Dijon mustard
2 Tbsp fresh Dill
1 tsp lemon juice (or zest if you have it)
Salt and Pepper to taste
2 Tbsp olive oil for frying

Preheat your oven to 400 and bake the fish for 10-12 minutes, or until cooked through.

While the fish is baking, combine eggs, mayo, mustard, dill, lemon juice, salt and pepper in a mixing bowl. Whisk together. (Note: Start with less mayo, then add more once you've folded in your fish if it seems like the mixture is too dry.)

After you've pulled the fish from the oven, take a fork and flake the filets, then add to the mixing bowl. Fold in your fish. Once combined, use a large spoon to create little cakes on a plate. You should have enough to make 7-8. Let these cakes chill for at least 30 minutes before frying.

When the cakes are ready, heat your olive oil in a wide skillet until the pan is nice and hot. Add your cakes and fry for about 2 minutes on each side, or until golden brown.

After the cakes are all done, serve any way you like! Serve with a side of veggies, over salad, or on buns-- whatever you like! The leftovers can be stored in the fridge for up to 3 days, or frozen in airtight ziplocks for up to 2 months.

A Little "Work" for Love

Being in a relationship with anyone is hard work; it takes maintenance, patience, commitment, and creativity. It also requires being tuned in to your partner's needs and wants. Being in a relationship with a pilot who is home only 2 days a week (on a regular week) is even more challenging! The added obstacle of distance can certainly present its own set of complications and difficulties, ranging from limited communication to just plain loneliness.

Eric and I are blessed to consider ourselves not only partners in a relationship, but best friends as well. We also tend to talk a lot more than normal couples, usually for a few hours every day, cumulatively. We've been together for a long time and are very familiar with each others' expectations and needs, as well as each others' gifts and special traits. But even with all of these things going for us, we still have to “show up” to our relationship every day and put in the time and effort to make it the wonderful thing that it is.

One of the ways that we work on our relationship (“work” meaning purposefully doing things for the strength and stability of our relationship) is by taking time at the beginning of each week to ask a few questions. I found this idea on Pinterest and I'm SO glad we tried it out. Here is what we ask each other:

1. What did I do this past week to make you feel loved and encouraged?
2. What does this week look like for you?
3. What can I do this week to make you feel loved and encouraged?
4. What can I do this week physically to make you feel loved and encouraged?
5. How can I pray for you this week?

We each take turns asking each other the questions and answering until we make it all the way to number 5. These questions are so simple, yet they are so powerful.

Question 1 gives us a chance to praise one another for things we appreciate-- very important! This starts us off on a good note and it gives us a chance to remind ourselves of how great the other person is.

Question 2 allows us to share what's coming schedule-wise with the other person. If I have a hectic Wednesday, Eric will know about it and that way he can understand why I may not be in the best mood that day. Being open about what's going on helps us mentally prepare for our needs and the needs of each other.

Question 3 literally makes us prepare ourselves for the other person's needs. It's also great because it gives us both a chance to explicitly ask for whatever it is we want to see from the other person, whether that means asking for patience on a particular day, a phone call, or even asking the other person to remember to do X, Y, Z so that we can focus on our stuff. Eric and I are not mind-readers, so asking each other for things out loud is a great way to avoid misunderstandings and unrealistic expectations.

Question 4 is certainly intimate, but again, it allows us to ask for what we need. On weeks like this week where we aren't actually going to get to see one another, this question reminds us to set a FaceTime date so that we can at least see each other on the screen and feel closer.

Question 5 helps us remember that we are not in this alone; God is always a part of our lives, and therefore a part of our relationship. Including Him in our relationship in an active way helps us to connect on a much more significant level, and it helps us to appreciate one another in a deeper way.

Eric and I ask each other these questions every Sunday, regardless of whether our weeks have been going well. On easy weeks, these questions are usually accompanied by a lot of joking and laughter. On weeks when it's been a little tougher, these weeks allow us to be vulnerable and honest with each other in a safe way, where we can speak to what we love and need from each other without arguing or belittling one another.

I recommend these questions to anyone in a relationship. It's a lovely routine to have and a terrific way to keep the lines of communication open, both between you and your partner and you, your partner, and God. Try it out and you'll see what I mean!

Ironically, A Chocolate Cake Recipe

Hello, world!

I'm still trucking along on the reduced-carb journey. So far I'm down 8 pounds! Things are going well, and I'm almost to the point where this diet is automatic. Though I originally planned to cut down my carbs by half, and then cut them down again, I've stayed at cutting them in half because the results have been so quick and it's been pretty easy. I don't really see the need to go further; this is a lifestyle I can embrace! Right now I'm on target to reach my goal weight by graduation! That's right, when I walk across the stage I'll be pretending that I'm walking down the catwalk to "I'm Too Sexy" and strutting appropriately.

That being said, living on 100 grams of carbs a day can be challenging when you find an amazing recipe for chocolate cake and you want to eat the whole thing in one sitting. But what is life without challenge?

I made this cake for Eric for our Valentine's Day celebration and we both LOVED it. It was so moist that frosting it would have been completely over the top (no pun intended!)-- this cake was amazing without the extra sugar rush. Instead we served it with strawberries and whipped cream: Heaven!

To make this cake you'll need:
2 cups white sugar
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cup cocoa powder, unsweetened
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 eggs
1 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup boiling water

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Spray your pan with cooking spray or use butter. You can use any size/shape pan you want. I used a bundt pan to make the cake look fancy with absolutely no work whatsoever. I like to stay true to who I am.

2. In a large bowl, stir together the sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Add the eggs, milk, oil and vanilla, and mix for 2 minutes with a mixer or a large whisk. Stir in the boiling water last. The batter will be thin. Pour evenly into your cake pan(s).

3. Bake 30 to 35 minutes in the preheated oven, until a toothpick comes out clean. Cool in the pan for 10 minutes, then remove to a wire rack to cool completely.

If you love the tingly burn of way too much sugar, throw some frosting on that sucker! If not, you can serve your cake like we did with a little fruit to help drown out your conscious as it scolds you for eating such an amazing treat. 

Whichever way you choose to go, I think you'll be pretty happy. Enjoy! 

Carb Cutback: Week 2

Get excited.

Since cutting carbs in half (which has become almost second-nature in only a week and a half!) I have lost 2 1/2 pounds! I don't anticipate (or want) to lose weight at this rate for much longer-- this is probably just the initial drop-off from making such a big change. Right now my goal is to lose a pound a week. Here are some things I tried this week that have worked wonders:

I allow myself to have a piece of toast with my breakfast (usually 1 scrambled or boiled egg) and I even allow myself to have a love affair with butter. But I no longer add jam (this has been tough). Instead, I add fruit or I save those sugars for later in the day when I know I'll be needing a boost.

I have hearty lunches. Instead of something light at lunch (which induces cravings and unnecessary snacking later) I go ahead and fill up! My lunches of choice have been tuna salad with crackers, hearty potato soup, and of course my leftovers from the previous night's dinner.

When it's time for a snack, or when I feel a craving coming on, I pour myself a glass of iced tea or fruit punch-- something that tastes sugary but is actually sugar-free. Then, only if that drink doesn't cut it, I'll have a snack. I've been a little limited by my budget, so right now my snacks are Nutri-Grain bars or cheese with a couple of crackers, but on my next grocery trip I'll be buying bananas to freeze in bite-size pieces with peanut butter, yogurt, fruit, and lunch meat (sometimes a couple slices of ham or turkey rolled up is enough to get by).

At dinner I've been cutting out breads and pastas almost completely. If I have a few carbs left to "spend" (referring to my goal number of course) then I'll have a piece of garlic toast or I'll put a couple of croutons on my salad. Otherwise, I ignore those things altogether. This past week for dinner I've had roasted fish with lemon, onions, and potato slices; thinly sliced zucchini sauteed with olive oil and garlic and topped with meat sauce; and chicken cutlets topped with brown sugar, paired with broccoli.

Since I'm eating alone most nights it's easy to have leftovers a couple of nights each week, which also keeps me from splurging when I try to think up a new meal.

While tracking my meals and watching myself reach that goal number every day has been awesome, by far the MOST rewarding part of all this has been seeing how FAST my work has paid off. After two days I felt more energized, less "ick" from eating junk, and very proud. After 12 days I feel slimmer (and I look it, too), it's much easier to stay on track, and even after being sleep-deprived for 3 nights in a row, I've been able to maintain my energy.

If you're thinking about making a change or you're in the process and you're struggling, I strongly advise you to take it slow like I did. I didn't completely eliminate carbs, I just cut back. I didn't deprive myself of food, I just replaced heavy calories (junk food) with lighter ones (veggies, fruits, etc.). I still eat the same amount and I even still eat things like chocolate and cereal and occasionally oatmeal. I just make sure I stay within the bounds of my set plan and it has been working like a charm. Right now I'm set to reach my goal weight in April. That's like. Right around the corner.

Like I said, get excited!

Carb Cutback: Week 1

It's day 5 of my recent carb cutback. So far it's been pretty manageable. There have certainly been a few obstacles, but I already feel great and I've noticed how quickly this change has affected my weight.

I began last Saturday when I counted my carbs for the whole day (in grams, subtracting fiber). At the end of the day, I added up that number, divided it by 2, and got my goal for this week.

Every day I have tried to make small changes to help me reach that goal. The first day was hard-- I felt like I couldn't eat anything! By Wednesday I figured out how to plan my meals out for the whole day so that I could meet my goal AND satisfy my appetite and cravings. I was thrown completely off track yesterday, as Eric and I had planned to make homemade pizzas and we had a moscato wine cake for dessert for Valentine's Day. (What can I say, I'm in love!) Today I'm back on track.

Some things I've learned/changed so far to help me meet my goal:
1. I eat a scrambled egg for my breakfast on days when I want a sandwich for lunch or pasta for dinner. Otherwise I stick with my oatmeal, which does a lot for my digestive health and keeps me full all morning. Planning my meals like this helps me stay on track, while eating what I like!
2. I plan to switch out my pasta for veggie substitutes; this week I'm trying out thinly sliced zucchini with sauce instead of spaghetti.
3. Drinking water throughout the day helps me to keep from feeling hungry or getting cravings that will throw me off track (I usually drink 5-6 glasses a day anyway, but I've been especially diligent about it this week).

It feels great to be taking this one step at a time. Cutting carbs in half has been very manageable and has kept me from having to completely change my diet. Instead, I'm making small changes that make a big impact and keep me sane. Moderation has worked best for me so far when it comes to weight loss, and I plan to stick with it!

For week 2 I'm sticking with the same goal number. I want to meet that goal every day before I try to cut back more.

Project Me is Underway

Hello world.

If you have been reading this blog for a while you should know by now that I have embraced the idea of "project me". I'm constantly in search of ways to better myself, to better my life, and to better my taste buds! These things collide in lovely and magnificent ways most of the time. Some of the time the result is an extra 5 pounds that I'm not too fond of. Which is why today I started a new project.

In the past I've accomplished weight loss by making life changes, not by dieting or embarking on some crazy exercise routine (because, let's face it-- my exercise mainly consists of toning my arms while I raise and lower my TV remote). I hardly ever drink sodas anymore, and when I do it's often a Coke Zero or diet version. I don't really do fast food except for when I'm home, mostly because it's inconvenient here in Chicago and I don't have much of a taste for it anymore. And I've been eating vegetables and NOT feeling like I deserve a gold star, because it's finally just a regular part of my diet.

However, this has not been enough. I'm very happy with these changes and I love that I can enjoy my meals and lifestyle with less crap in my system, but my weight loss goals just haven't quite been accomplished. So as I searched for ideas and solutions over the last month, I stumbled across an announcement that Eric's sister Emily made-- she'd just lost 5 pounds after starting the Atkins diet and cutting way back on her carbs.

It was like a freakin' football field's lightbulbs went off over my head. I need to pay attention to my carbs.

I love carbs. I love eating them, I love anticipating eating them, and I'm happy to resort to relying on them for my happiness if I outlive Eric. But that's part of the problem. I eat way too many carbs with each meal, and I'm not talking about the carbs I get from veggies and fruits. I'm talking pasta, crackers, bread (Oh, how I love bread), cereal, grains, you name it. This is not going to be easy.

However, today I decided to finally quit thinking about how to cut out carbs and I took my first step towards making a plan. First of all, I decided I'm not going to go on any diets. I'm going to keep doing what has worked; I'm going to address carbs in a way that works for my lifestyle, in a way I can adopt as "normal" so that I don't just gain all that weight back.

Today I took a notebook and wrote out a page for every day for the rest of the month. I'm going to track what I eat, noting the calorie content (I am currently trying to jumpstart my weight loss by sticking to 1500 a day) and the carb content. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to work to cut that carb number in half. Every day I will write down what I eat and make sure I'm on target for my calorie count (I also use an app for this, called "Lose It!"), and I'll also be able to make sure I'm on target for my carb count. At the end of each week I will think about how easy/difficult it was to meet that carb goal and either cut it down further, or spend another week focusing on sticking to it.

By March I hope to be eating 1/2 the carbs I do now, without struggling. I figure that if I manage to meet that goal, or even go beyond it, I'll be thrilled! March 1st I will decide what my next goal will be. From what I've heard Atkins dieters do something like 20 carbs a day-- I'm not sure that that number fits my lifestyle. In fact, I'm not really sure of what my end goal will be! But that's what this journey is all about. I want to find a number that works and stick to it.

I'll be posting here about my progress, as well as what changes I make to achieve that progress. So stay tuned and get excited! Project Me is underway!

(BTW, Project Me is universal-- anyone can have a self-bettering project. What's yours?)